Many reasons have driven Arab and Muslim families to migrate to Europe, ranging from the search for better job opportunities and a dignified life after being crushed by poverty in their home countries, to escaping to a society that is more free, open, and respectful of human dignity—values that have been crushed in some of their home countries. The reasons also include seeking asylum and fleeing from wars, political persecution, and torture in other countries.

While the first generation of immigrants migrated in pursuit of a livelihood and was relatively welcomed in Europe due to the continent's need for labor after World War II, it was also the simplest generation. It lived in semi-isolated communities on the outskirts of major cities, content with whatever means of living were provided in exchange for performing generally hard or low-status jobs. The highest ambition of these immigrants was to bring their families from their home countries to feel a sense of stability in their diaspora.

The first generation of immigrants had a natural religiosity that blended religious beliefs with the cultural traditions of their home countries. Since they lived in a sort of “ghetto” and chose to remain isolated from the host society, they did not experience much struggle. Many of these families did not even master the local language, particularly the women, who adhered to their traditional roles as they had in their native lands and had very limited participation in public life.

However, the children of these immigrants, known as the second generation—those born in diaspora —or the so-called “1.5 generation” (children who arrived at a young age before adolescence), took a different path. They attended school as a legal requirement, became fluent in the local language just like native citizens, and even acquired European citizenship. At this point, the question of assimilation and integration arose.

Identity Crisis

The second generation faced a significant struggle between the values they received at home and those taught at school, where they spent most of their day. The education system often cast doubt on their beliefs and core principles. They also suffered a psychological conflict between their sense of being European citizens and their experience of alienation due to their skin color, facial features, and even their names, which often led to exclusion and discrimination.

This struggle eventually infiltrated immigrant families, causing some children to rebel against their conservative family rules and adopt European values in dress, relationships, and behavior, hoping to resolve their internal conflict. However, they encountered another challenge—rejection. Despite their attempts to blend in, they were still seen as outsiders and met with suspicion.

Another segment of the second generation chose a different path—one of positive integration. They maintained their religious identity while stripping it of cultural customs and traditions, and at the same time, actively participated in various aspects of society, including politics. They worked on establishing mosques that harbored the entire Muslim family, with designated spaces for women, units for teaching children Arabic and basic Islamic principles, event halls for family gatherings, and facilities for preparing halal meals, especially during Ramadan.

This approach yielded positive results, but it eventually clashed with the rise of far-right extremism, particularly after the events of September 11, which triggered a wave of Islamophobia, hate speech, and racism in many European countries. These challenges had a profound impact on the third and fourth generations of immigrants—those born to parents who themselves were born in Europe.

Despite speaking the language fluently, understanding cultural norms, forming social relationships, and achieving high levels of education, their connection to their ancestral homeland weakened significantly—often limited to short annual vacations, if circumstances permitted. However, despite all this, the issue of integration and identity crisis persisted. In many cases and places, they still felt unwelcome, continued to be treated as outsiders, and were labeled as “children of immigrants.”

When refugee families arrived in Europe, they found that the two paths of assimilation and integration were already well established—both as individual choices for families and as state policies that either pushed refugees towards complete assimilation or encouraged their participation and integration.

Educational and Cultural Erosion

These were the circumstances under which immigrant and refugee families in Europe lived—caught between rejection and identity confusion. The push for assimilation or absorption into European values sometimes took a coercive form, such as the forced removal of children from their parents if a parent made a disciplinary mistake, even something as minor as mild physical punishment. Some of these children were placed with other families, and their biological parents never saw them again.

Most refugee families enroll their children in free public schools due to financial difficulties. In these schools, where children spend most of their week, they are taught that their parents have no right to discipline them, even mildly, and that they should call emergency services if they experience any mistreatment. Given that parenting inevitably involves some mistakes and emotional outbursts—especially among refugee families who adhere to their traditional methods of upbringing—many families live under constant fear and threat.

Assimilation also took a voluntary path, leading to the emergence of the so-called “cultural Muslim.” This term describes individuals of Muslim heritage who no longer practice the religion or only follow it in a minimal, folkloric way. In some cases, these individuals are no longer Muslim in belief but retain Islam as an ethnic or cultural identity—much like secular Jews who still identify as Jewish. Consequently, there are now “Muslim atheists,” just as there are “Jewish atheists.” This phenomenon has contributed to the fragmentation and disintegration of refugee Muslim families, where one family member fully assimilates and identifies merely as a cultural Muslim.

Integration, but at What Cost?

The close security monitoring of refugee families—which has even extended to surveilling children's school writings—has created an atmosphere of suspicion and fear, preventing these families from participating normally in society. Additionally, high unemployment rates and residence in impoverished neighborhoods with inadequate services have reinforced their sense of alienation and made integration even more difficult.

Despite these challenges, many refugee families have attempted to integrate into society. However, one of the unexpected consequences has been a sharp rise in divorce rates. Women who sought integration into European life to avoid accusations of isolation and to secure a better living standard for their families encountered a form of cultural shock. They became aware of the many legal rights granted to women in Europe, which significantly altered family dynamics.

As refugee women entered the workforce, traditional family roles shifted. When marital conflicts arose—as they naturally do—turning to the legal system became an easier option than enduring hardship for the sake of family unity. This trend was exacerbated by the absence of extended family support networks and by the financial independence that refugee women gained. European governments provide financial and legal support for women, making divorce more accessible and attractive than ever before. As a result, divorce rates among refugees have reached unprecedented levels.

It is also impossible to ignore the psychological pressures that refugee families endure due to the trauma of displacement. These stresses increase anxiety and insecurity, intensify marital disputes, and ultimately lead to the breakdown of refugee families through divorce.

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