A child is born, and with them, mercy and compassion are born in the hearts of their parents. They wish to protect their child from all harm, to keep their heart free from sorrow, and their laughter unspoiled by tears. However, Allah has decreed that life will not be free from worry and hardship. With the child's first steps, they stumble and fall until they master walking. The same goes for speaking and other needs. The child learns, along with their parents, that life is not all rosy. It requires effort, experiencing success at times and failure at others. Gradually, the child understands this concept as they navigate through life. Therefore, it is essential for parents to teach their children how to deal with life's difficulties, trials, and tribulations.

Islam provides comprehensive methods for raising a child from an early age to grow up aware of the realities of life, strong in navigating its challenges, and protected from succumbing to the difficulties they encounter. Below are the key methods for achieving this:

1. Instilling Faith, Including the Concept of Trials:

The educator begins by instilling sound faith from the child's birth, gradually introducing them to Allah, the Creator of everything, the reward, and Paradise prepared for righteous servants. The child is gradually introduced to the concept of trials and how they elevate one's ranks and expiate sins. When the child falls, the parents teach them to say, “Alhamdulillah (All praise is due to Allah) in all circumstances.” When they see someone afflicted, they reinforce these meanings and reassure the child that these pains are alleviated by Allah’s mercy and that the ultimate goal is for the servant to win Paradise, where its bliss makes any hardship in this world seem insignificant.

These concepts are instilled through the child's daily experiences, helping them understand that everyone's life is filled with difficulties, but a Muslim's perspective on them is different.

2. Explaining Universal Laws Simply:

The concept of universal laws can be conveyed to the child by integrating the stories of the prophets with daily life situations. The stories of the prophets should not just be read as tales but presented as live examples. The educator takes a scene from these stories and focuses on it until the child internalizes its meanings. For example, teaching profound lessons such as:

• Oppression: With the current siege of Gaza, one can talk to the child about the Prophet Muhammad's siege in the Valley of Abu Talib, showing how Muslims remained steadfast until Allah’s victory came. It can be explained that it is Allah’s law for disbelievers to gain power as a test of the believers' sincerity and steadfastness, and that the ultimate outcome is for the pious.
• Injustice: The child may witness or experience injustice. They can be reminded of the story of Prophet Yusuf, who was wrongfully imprisoned yet continued to call people to monotheism even in prison. This teaches that the cause of monotheism is the most important purpose in life, not to be abandoned regardless of the trials faced.
• Justice: Complete justice in this world is unattainable; it will be achieved in the Hereafter. Thus, the Muslim should not be saddened if they do not see victory or receive all their rights in this life.

3. Explaining the Concept of Self-Struggle:

Sometimes, parents unintentionally present an idealized image of human nature, such as embellishing their own image when they make mistakes or suggesting they are always successful and never fail. This contradicts human nature susceptible to error. The correct approach is to explain that human nature is weak and that one's strength and success depend on their adherence to Allah’s guidance. They need regular self-purification to adopt good traits, hasten to repent and seek forgiveness without persisting in mistakes. This awareness helps the child navigate life with insight and understanding of themselves and others.

4. Clarifying the Child’s Perspective of This World:

Life is full of temptations. A child might long for things they do not have or see a corrupt person enjoying worldly pleasures and become tempted. It is crucial to explain to them the reality of this world—that it is a place of competition and vanity, insignificant to Allah, who grants it to disbelievers as a form of enticement and a test for others. These meanings can be illustrated through stories such as those of Qarun or Al-Walid ibn Al-Mughirah.

The child might aspire for a life free from worry or effort. This can be corrected by explaining that this world is a place of toil and no comfort, and that the Hereafter is the place for eternal bliss and ease without hardship. Every person in this world has concerns; either worldly or for the Hereafter. It is naive to imagine anyone is free from worries, but those whose concern is the Hereafter are aided by Allah and relieved of worldly worries.

5. Avoiding Overprotection:

Children should be given opportunities to solve their problems and manage their emotions, with guidance towards the right course of action. For example:

• When a child plays with a toy and fails to solve it, becoming frustrated, the educator should not rush to protect and solve the problem. Instead, they should give the child a chance to deal with their feelings of frustration and encourage them to try again. If the child fails, the educator helps with guidance and advice rather than providing a ready-made solution.
• If someone bothers the child, the educator should not rush to remove the discomfort but observe the child's reaction and then guide them on the appropriate behavior.

6. Appreciating Emotions While Bearing the Consequences of Actions:

Islam teaches that each individual is accountable for their actions and will be judged alone. This principle should be imparted to the child from an early age. For instance, if the child neglects a responsibility, the educator should not complete the task for them to avoid the teacher’s reprimand. Instead, they should let the child face the consequences of their negligence and learn that no one else will fulfill their responsibilities.

This does not contradict acknowledging the child’s feelings. If they feel embarrassed due to the teacher’s reprimand, the educator should not scold them but reassure them with understanding and then guide those emotions.

Every situation in a child’s life can be used to instill faith-based meanings gradually until their heart is filled with them, and their behavior aligns accordingly.

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