Searching for work, money, knowledge, and other purposes, migration imposes itself as a major challenge that leaves negative effects on marital life and family stability in many societies with high abroad migration rates.
According to the International Organization for Migration, the number of migrants in 2019 reached 272 million people worldwide; about 3.5% of the world's population living outside their original countries.
According to data from the same organization, Arab countries had a significant presence with 40 million migrants in the same year, including 9.3 million refugees. This means that the majority of migrants in the Arab world crossed borders in search of better economic and social opportunities.
Experts advise bringing the wife along during travel if possible.
Conversely, marital life may be negatively affected by the husband's absence, and marital disintegration and alienation may creep into homes, with the husband's long travel, the severance of the marital relationship, and the increasing challenges and pressures on the wife and children.
“Al-Mujtama” seeks in this investigation a prescription to repair the damage caused by migration to our families and communities amid a world dominated by materialism and consumerism, where the value of family and social cohesion is frighteningly declining.
A Difficult Experience
Mrs. Fatima Hassan summarizes her situation in the absence of her husband, who has been working in the Hashemite Kingdom of Jordan for about four years, saying: “Imagine that the other half of your heart lives in another country!”
She adds that at first, she encouraged her husband to travel because he had no job in Egypt, and that there was no other way to educate their three children except through migration. However, the reality she faced was that raising the children was difficult, and she needed her husband by her side to share her concerns and joys.
Another woman, who preferred not to be named, mentioned that her husband works in a butcher factory and returns to his accommodation at the end of the day exhausted and tired. Often, she can only speak with him for a few minutes, without addressing her emotional and psychological needs.
The husband should increase annual vacations to minimize the effects of long absences.
Nadia Ali sees a positive side to migration, which is securing abundant money and achieving a better future for the children. However, she acknowledges that the marital relationship becomes distant for long periods, affecting both parties emotionally, psychologically, and sexually, meaning that money will not bring everything to the couple.
Iman Mahmoud admits that her children's academic and moral levels have declined due to her husband's long-term travel, reducing him to a mere source of money without being a role model or educational reference in the house. This is a heavy price for migration that only those who have suffered it can feel.
Negative Effects
Professor of Sociology at Ain Shams University, Ali Abdel-Sattar, explained to “Al-Mujtama” the nature of the effects resulting from the husband's separation from his wife to work abroad, noting that it leads to a set of challenges that negatively impact their relationship. One of the most significant challenges is the feeling of loneliness and depression, which affects their mental health and social relationships.
He added that another challenge is the emotional void between the spouses, as both feel this void due to physical separation, leading to the deterioration of emotional and sexual communication. Therefore, frequent mutual visits and avoiding long absences are essential to strengthen their relationship and family bonds, and they should seek specialists in family counseling if problems escalate.
Professor of Psychology at Tanta University, Dr. Kamel Al-Midani, believes that the husband's long absence from his wife can cause her complex psychological illnesses such as anxiety and stress, which reflects on her relationship with her children and surroundings. He noted that it is understandable that the man did not leave his wife by choice but due to economic reasons in most cases. However, the man should not become merely a tool for fulfilling his desire to accumulate money but must also recognize his responsibility towards his family by providing them with love, care and protection from psychological illnesses.
Practical Solutions
Family expert Engy Saeed asserts that the migrant wife is under great psychological pressure due to bearing household responsibilities and raising children alone, in addition to worrying about her husband. She noted that the husband's absence usually has a negative impact on the children, reflected in their behavior and social relationships.
It is dangerous to provide money only and ignore giving the family love and care.
She added that the solution is in the Quran, as Allah the Almighty says, “And of His signs is that He created for you from yourselves mates that you may find tranquility in them; and He placed between you affection and mercy. Indeed in that are signs for a people who give thought.” (Ar-Rum: 21)
Saeed advises continuous communication between the spouses, especially with the advancement of communication technologies, emphasizing the need for regular communication through phone calls, messages, or videos. Setting specific times for daily or weekly communication is essential for sharing daily life details.
Experts interviewed by “Al-Mujtama” recommend that the husband should bring his wife along during travel if possible. If not, he should increase annual vacations to reduce the impact of long absences from his wife. Setting a goal for the travel, and returning as soon as it is achieved to reunite the family and provide them with love, care, and protection is crucial, following the Prophet Muhammad's (peace be upon him) saying: “Beware. every one of you is a shepherd and every one is answerable with regard to his flock. The Caliph is a shepherd over the people and shall be questioned about his subjects (as to how he conducted their affairs). A man is a guardian over the members of his family and shall be questioned about them (as to how he looked after their physical and moral well-being). A woman is a guardian over the household of her husband and his children and shall be questioned about them (as to how she managed the household and brought up the children). A slave is a guardian over the property of his master and shall be questioned about it (as to how he safeguarded his trust). Beware, every one of you is a guardian and every one of you shall be questioned with regard to his trust.” (Agreed upon)
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