Hadeel

Hadeel

5 Ways to Overcome Fear

October 22, 2024

Fear is a natural human emotion that one may experience in various situations in life. However, this feeling can become harmful if it starts affecting our daily lives and relationships with others. In this matter, Islam guides us to multiple ways to overcome fear and boost self-confidence by returning to the teachings of the Qur'an.

Here, we present five key points to help you overcome fear:

1. Reliance on Allah
Reliance on Allah (Tawakkul) is one of the most important concepts in Islam. It means taking the necessary actions, while knowing that success and failure are in the hands of Allah. This level of trust provides a sense of security and reduces fear. Allah reminds us in the Qur'an that He is the Protector, and no one can harm us except by His permission. He is the Trustee in whom we should place our trust. Allah says: "And rely upon Allah; and sufficient is Allah as Disposer of affairs" (Surah Al-Ahzab: 3).

2. Belief in Divine Decree (Qadar)
Belief in divine decree (Qadar) is one of the pillars of faith, as mentioned in the hadith of Jibril when he asked the Prophet about faith. The Prophet replied: "To believe in Allah, His Angels, His Books, His Messengers, the Last Day, and the divine decree, both good and bad." (Sahih Muslim).
Everything that happens in life, whether it be trials, challenges, or blessings, is known by Allah before it occurs and is written in the Preserved Tablet (Al-Lawh Al-Mahfuz). Allah says: "Say, 'Never will we be struck except by what Allah has decreed for us; He is our protector.' And upon Allah let the believers rely." (Surah At-Tawbah: 51).
Understanding that all difficulties are by Allah's decree enables a Muslim to accept hardships, avoid excessive worry, and have patience, for patience is rewarded with Paradise. As Allah says: "And will reward them for what they patiently endured [with] a garden [in Paradise] and silk [garments]." (Surah Al-Insan: 12).
This belief helps Muslims accept difficult circumstances and avoid overwhelming anxiety, knowing that everything is predestined and that one will never be burdened beyond their capacity. As Allah says: "Allah does not charge a soul except [with that within] its capacity." (Surah Al-Baqarah: 286).

3. Supplication (Du'a) and Remembrance of Allah (Dhikr)
Supplication and remembrance of Allah are forms of worship, as Allah commands in His Book: "So remember Me; I will remember you." (Surah Al-Baqarah: 152).
Remembrance of Allah brings peace to the heart, as He says: "Unquestionably, by the remembrance of Allah hearts are assured." (Surah Ar-Ra'd: 28).
Allah also commands us to invoke Him and promises to respond to our supplications. We can ask Allah for anything, and in His generosity, He answers our prayers and bestows countless blessings upon us, such as food, drink, clothing, peace of mind, satisfaction, forgiveness, and guidance to the straight path. Allah says: "And your Lord says, 'Call upon Me; I will respond to you.'" (Surah Ghafir: 60).

4. Reading the Qur'an
The Qur'an is always a source of tranquility, no matter the time, place, or situation. It is our protection from the whispers of Satan, and there are verses that remove fear and anxiety. Allah says: "Those who have believed and whose hearts are assured by the remembrance of Allah. Unquestionably, by the remembrance of Allah hearts are assured." (Surah Ar-Ra'd: 28).
The two chapters Al-Mu'awwidhatayn (Surah Al-Falaq and Surah An-Nas) were revealed as a protection for the Prophet from sorcery. Reciting them during morning and evening remembrances serves as a shield from harm. Many verses in the Qur'an speak of patience, strength, trust in Allah, and reliance on Him.

5. Seeking Refuge in Allah from Satan
Satan always seeks to spread fear and anxiety in the hearts of believers, and his whispers are a form of illness. The cure is to seek refuge in Allah from him. Satan's goal is to mislead people, so Allah describes him as an enemy: "Indeed, Satan is an enemy to you; so take him as an enemy. He only invites his party to be among the companions of the Blaze." (Surah Fatir: 6). Allah also says: "And if there comes to you from Satan an evil suggestion, then seek refuge in Allah. Indeed, He is the Hearing, the Knowing." (Surah Fussilat: 36).
Whenever a person feels overwhelmed by whispers, they should seek refuge in Allah from Satan by saying, "I seek refuge in Allah from the accursed Satan," with sincerity and strong faith, knowing that Allah is the only protector from all harm.

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With the start of the new academic year and the numerous school assignments that students are tasked with by their teachers, parents often rush to help their children complete these tasks, closely supervising the entire educational process. In some cases, they even study with them continuously and monitor all subjects alongside them.

Experts say that there are mistakes made during the process of studying with a child, which negatively affect the child's academic performance and ability to understand and retain information, possibly leading to disappointing results. One of the most prominent mistakes is the parents' constant involvement in the child's studying, assuming that the child hasn’t put in enough effort because they didn’t spend long hours studying and monitoring them constantly without considering that each child’s abilities differ from one to another.

In this context, educational experts advise:

First: It is important to encourage the child to learn and acquire information, and to engage them in discussions about the new knowledge they’ve gained. This enhances their self-confidence and motivates them to seek new information. However, it is a mistake to demand that the child achieve a certain grade and constantly chase them with questions about scores and results, ignoring the importance of learning in itself.

Second: It is a mistake to consistently help the child with their homework. Instead, it is better for the child to complete their homework and study their lessons independently, instilling a culture of self-reliance and building their confidence in their ability to complete the tasks assigned to them.

A mother can help her child start studying or answer one or two questions while they’re doing their homework, but should gradually step back and give the child the chance to complete their work independently and answer the assigned questions on their own, with small rewards or something the child likes as encouragement, but without making it a habit.

Third: Avoid any distractions during your child's study time, such as the television, phone, games, and the like. It's also not advisable to study with them on the bed, as this will make them feel lazy and inclined to sleep. Moreover, it is a mistake to chat beside them about household matters with friends or family, as this will undoubtedly distract them.

Experts, according to Al Jazeera Net, emphasize that children may lose focus and interest in studying and doing homework if they are surrounded by distractions. Thus, it is recommended to provide a conducive environment for studying in a room designed for this purpose, with a ban on games and social media apps until study tasks are completed.

Fourth: It is preferable to set a specific time frame for completing each task or activity, or to use a timer to encourage the child to complete their homework. It’s also beneficial to have a set time for studying each day, with designated breaks, such as 5 minutes of rest for every 20 minutes of studying. It’s important to encourage the child to organize their day, create a study schedule, and prioritize their tasks, ensuring that a subject they enjoy doesn’t overshadow another subject they may not like as much. Listening to their preferences about which subject they want to start with is also essential.

Fifth: Monitor your child's weak points and keep a notebook to track them without the child noticing, and follow up with their teachers, especially if they struggle with academic skills, according to the "Parenting" website.

In light of this, discussions with their teachers can help find better ways to improve their academic level or provide interactive methods that increase their love for learning, such as educational games, documentaries, trips to museums to learn about their country's history, or public parks to discover the secrets of the plant world. They can also be enrolled in a science camp or a cultural competition, which connects the child to various sciences in an enjoyable way, making studying a fun time rather than a form of punishment.

It’s also important to understand the type of learning your child prefers, whether auditory, visual, or kinesthetic. Some children learn by reading, others by writing, and some by studying out loud to help retain information if they are auditory learners. It's essential to discuss their abilities and strengths or weaknesses with their teachers.

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The Muslim woman today faces a significant dilemma between her essential, multifaceted duties and responsibilities. There are those who want her to abandon these responsibilities, which are crucial for the revival of the Ummah, preserving it, and restoring its leadership by raising and preparing men to fulfill their roles.

At a time when the world is reordering its priorities and correcting its paths according to the innate human disposition that Allah has placed in the souls of His creation, regardless of their beliefs, we hear voices that started faintly and grew louder, including former U.S. President George Bush, who considered separating boys from girls in mixed schools. Similarly, other voices, many of them women who once demanded equal work rights with men, now call for a return to the home, dedicating time to the husband and raising children as a form of justice for women.

On the other hand, in our Muslim lands, we find that some continue to oppose this natural order and divine laws, going against human nature under the pretext of women's rights, pulling women out of their rightful place, causing homes to collapse, and bringing down the Ummah behind them.

Unfortunately, we see some committed women falling into this corrupt trap, getting busy with matters far less significant than the duties Allah created them for, resulting in neglect of their rights towards their husbands and children. This brief message is for them, urging them to learn from and emulate Umm al-Mu’minin, Khadijah (may Allah be pleased with her), to understand how a believing woman should be the wife of a da'ee.

A Blessed Woman and the Best of the World's Women

The woman of all women of her time, Umm al-Qasim, daughter of Khuwaylid ibn Asad ibn Abd al-Uzza ibn Qusayy ibn Kilab, from the Quraysh tribe, was the mother of the children of the Messenger of Allah ﷺ . She was the first to believe in him and support him before anyone else, calming his fears and taking him to her cousin, Waraqah (1).

Her virtues are many, and she is among the women who reached perfection. She was wise, noble, religious, pure, and generous, one of the people of Paradise. The Prophet ﷺ used to praise her, favoring her over all his other wives and showing immense reverence for her. Aisha (may Allah be pleased with her) once said: "Never did I feel jealous of any woman as I was jealous of Khadija, for the Prophet praised her very often." It is also narrated that the Prophet never married another woman while she was alive, nor did he take any concubines. When she passed away, he was deeply affected by her loss, for she had been his ideal companion, supporting him financially, and he used to trade for her.

Allah commanded the Prophet ﷺ to give her the glad tidings of a house in Paradise made of pearls, where there would be neither noise nor toil.

Al-Waqidi narrated that Ibn Abi Habibah heard from Dawood bin al-Husayn, from Ikrimah, from Ibn Abbas, and Ibn Abi al-Zinad narrated from Hisham, and Jubayr bin Mut’im narrated that Khadijah’s uncle, Amr bin Asad, married her to the Prophet ﷺ, and her father had passed away before the battle of al-Fijar (2). Al-Zubayr bin Bakkar said that Khadijah was known as "the pure one" in the pre-Islamic period. Her mother was Fatimah bint Za’idah al-‘Amiriyyah.

Abdullah al-Bahi reported that Aisha (may Allah be pleased with her) said: "Whenever the Messenger of Allah mentioned Khadijah, he would praise her and seek forgiveness for her without tiring. One day, he mentioned her, and I felt jealous, so I said, 'Allah has replaced that old woman for you.' He became angry, and I said to myself, 'O Allah, if you remove the anger of Your Messenger from me, I will never mention her with anything but good again.' When the Prophet saw what I had done, he said, 'How could you say that? By Allah, she believed in me when people disbelieved in me, she supported me when people abandoned me, and she bore my male children when none of you did.'" She added, "He continued mentioning her frequently for a month."

Abu Musa reported that the Messenger of Allah ﷺ said: "Many men have been perfect, but among women only Mary the daughter of `Imran and Asiya the wife of Pharaoh were perfect; and `A'isha's superiority over women is like the superiority of tharid over other kinds of food" (Reported by Bukhari and Muslim) (3).

The Wise Wife

She (may Allah be pleased with her) did not need men, wealth, prestige, lineage, or protection, for she had the highest of these. However, with her pure nature, she understood that a woman’s life is incomplete without a just man to oversee her. A man who embodies the highest virtues, morals, and manhood, even if he is 15 years younger than her.

From the moment she met Muhammad ﷺ, she realized that he was no ordinary man, that he had a different destiny. She didn't know what it was, but she sensed that his qualities were extraordinary, and she knew she had a duty toward him—to support, love, and protect him and spare him the trivial matters of life.

She took on this role, especially during the period when he would seclude himself in the cave of Hira each year to worship his Lord. When the revelation came to him, he did not turn to his uncle who raised him or to his friend Abu Bakr, but rather to his wife, who provided him with love, wisdom, warmth, and security. This is how a noble wife should be—the wife of a man with great responsibility, a da'ee, or a mujahid. She must support him, believe in him, encourage him, embrace him, and shield him from worldly concerns.

When the Prophet returned saying, “Cover me, cover me,” she calmed his fears and reassured him: “By Allah, Allah will never disgrace you. You uphold the ties of kinship, speak the truth, help the poor, are hospitable to guests, and assist those afflicted by calamities.”

He said to her, "O Khadijah, I fear for myself." She responded with words that shine through history as a beacon: the words of a confident, loving wife. Then she took him to her cousin Waraqah bin Nawfal, who was a man of the scriptures, to give him the glad tidings of prophethood, and Khadijah became the first to believe.

The Loving Wife with a Mission

After prophethood, the Prophet's life changed drastically. He became preoccupied with the message and worship, leaving little time for anything else. Their home became a refuge for the weak and oppressed new believers, and a sanctuary for those seeking safety with the Prophet and his noble wife, who took on a huge responsibility. Many with great duties in life are weighed down by the responsibility of their home and family, but Khadijah (may Allah be pleased with her) was not married to an ordinary man. She bore the responsibility placed upon her.

Their home was full of children, including Zayd ibn Harithah, whom the Prophet ﷺ had adopted as his son until adoption was abolished. There was also Maysarah and Ali ibn Abi Talib. Despite the busy and crowded household, she was the loving wife who embraced her husband and created a peaceful environment for him to fulfill his great mission.

She supported him with her wealth, love, and unwavering belief, providing him with tranquility. As a reward, she was honored with the greeting of peace from her Lord, conveyed by the Angel Jibreel. Abu Huraira narrated that Jibreel came to the Prophet and said: “O Allah's Messenger ()! This is Khadija coming to you with a dish having meat soup (or some food or drink). When she reaches you, greet her on behalf of her Lord (i.e. Allah) and on my behalf, and give her the glad tidings of having a Qasab palace in Paradise wherein there will be neither any noise nor any fatigue (trouble)."

She left behind her home, comfort, and wealth to live with the Prophet in the valley of Abu Talib, a place of hardship, while being the daughter of the most noble. The Prophet ﷺ openly declared his love for her, saying: "I was blessed with her love."

May Allah have mercy on our mother Khadijah, the one who sacrificed all she had for her beloved Prophet and stood by him in every situation. She obeyed him and never disobeyed, shared his da’wah efforts, and relieved him of his responsibilities at home.

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(1) Siyar A'lam al-Nubala, Shams al-Din Muhammad ibn Ahmad ibn Uthman al-Dhahabi, vol. 2, p. 110.

(2) Ibid., p. 111.

(3) Al-Kashf wal-Bayan ‘an Tafsir al-Qur'an by al-Sha'bi (27/71).

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In contemporary society, particularly in Western cultures, a concerning trend has emerged: the normalization of casual relationships. This phenomenon, often referred to as "hook-up culture," involves engaging in superficial, temporary physical relationships without any emotional or long-term commitment. Promoted by media and social platforms as a symbol of personal freedom and self-expression 1, this culture raises critical questions: Does such unbridled liberty lead to happiness, or does it instead create an inner void and undermine human nature? Is it true freedom, or merely the enslavement to desires and pleasures?

What is the Hook-up Culture?

Hook-up culture promotes the idea that one can have physical intimacy with another person without any lasting commitment or connection. This culture grows in an environment that celebrates absolute individualism, reducing the value of the relationship between the sexes to mere momentary gratification. It thrives particularly among young people in universities and large cities, where moral and religious awareness is absent, replaced by an insatiable desire for experimentation and temporary pleasure.

According to a study published by "Psychology Today," this phenomenon is closely linked to deteriorating mental health, as young people participating in these relationships suffer from anxiety and depression due to emotional emptiness. What initially appears as freedom and independence quickly turns into a heavy psychological burden that is difficult to overcome.
Participation in this culture trains the mind to ignore emotions and responsibility, affecting how young people form relationships in the future. This is evident in the prevalence of television programs in the West centered around children whose fathers are unknown. The mother comes to the program to conduct a DNA test with a group of men, one of whom may be the father. These programs have some of the highest viewership ratings.

Psychological and Social Impacts of Hook-up Culture

Recent research indicates that these relationships are not merely isolated individual experiences but have far-reaching effects on society as a whole. Casual relationships reinforce the concept of selfishness and emotional consumption, turning people into mere tools for satisfying desires, which leads to a breakdown of trust between individuals and the destruction of genuine emotional bonds.

Psychologically, many participants in these relationships suffer from feelings of isolation and depression. A study conducted by Stanford University revealed that participants in casual relationships are more likely to develop psychological disorders such as depression and anxiety compared to their peers who choose to build committed and sustainable relationships.

How can such a society claim to be civilized and cohesive when its members follow their instincts and desires blindly, like animals living by their instincts, leaving behind children without fathers, with some resorting to abortion and killing fetus because they do not wish to bear the consequences of their actions? This leads to numerous psychological issues that reflect the disintegration of their society.

Islam and the Foundation of Strong Relationships

Amid the spread of this phenomenon in Western societies, Islam restores the value and dignity of humans by calling for self-discipline and control over desires. Islam directs human energy toward building relationships based on commitment and mutual respect. The Prophet Muhammad (peace be upon him) said: "Whoever among you can afford to marry, let him marry, for it helps lower the gaze and guard chastity. Whoever cannot afford it should fast, as it will be a restraint for him." (Sahih al-Bukhari)

In Islam, relationships are not merely a means to satisfy desires but a way to achieve tranquility and psychological balance by refining instincts rather than letting them run unchecked. Marriage is the only legitimate way to fulfill physical desires in a manner that preserves human dignity and protects society from corruption and decay.

Marriage in Islam is not just a relationship between a man and a woman, but a solemn covenant based on love and mercy. Allah says: "And of His signs is that He created for you from yourselves mates that you may find tranquility in them, and He placed between you affection and mercy" (Surah Ar-Rum: 21).

Marriage is not only a means of achieving individual happiness but also the cornerstone of building a strong Islamic society. The family is the institution that ensures the upbringing of generations on the correct values and enhances emotional and psychological stability. This is what is missing in societies that adopt the culture of casual relationships, which encourage the disintegration of families and the destruction of deep human relationships.

Facing the challenges of the age

In confronting the culture of casual relationships, we as Muslims must work to promote the culture of marriage and strong family relationships. Islamic societies must provide young people with support and counseling to direct their energies toward building stable families. Education and the media play a crucial role in reintroducing the model of the Muslim family as a successful and sustainable example. There must be continuous awareness about the dangers of casual relationships and their negative effects on mental and physical health, with a focus on the importance of marriage in building a cohesive and stable society.

In conclusion, Islam does not forbid human relationships but refines and directs them toward the higher goal of achieving a balance between the needs of the body and the spirit, and building a strong society based on respect and mercy. We must reconsider the impact of the culture of casual relationships on Muslim societies and strive to strengthen the values of family and marriage that make both the individual and society resilient in facing the challenges of the modern age.

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1. PubMed Central

2. Psychology Today

3. The Colgate Maroon News

Emotional neglect, or emotional deprivation, is a common issue that directly affects children, impacting their psychological and social development. Emotional neglect is defined as the failure to meet a child's emotional needs, whether intentional or unintentional 1. However, this neglect can lead to long-term effects on mental health and social interaction, influencing the development of their personalities and relationships in the future.

Effects of Emotional Deprivation on Children

American psychologist Megan Gunnar found that emotionally deprived children may struggle with executive functions 2, such as:

1. Working Memory: The ability to gather information to process and retrieve stored information for use in desired situations.

2. Inhibitory Control: The ability to stop thinking and reflect. It helps control the need to stop thinking before acting or speaking.

3. Cognitive Flexibility (Flexible Thinking): The ability to think flexibly and solve different problems. 3

Psychological studies indicate that children suffering from emotional neglect exhibit a variety of symptoms and problems, such as severe anxiety, difficulty regulating emotions, and an inability to understand the mental states of others. Additionally, the following issues may arise:

1. Low self-esteem: The child may grow up with a constant feeling of inadequacy and lack of self-worth, which affects their self-perception and their ability to interact with others.

2. Difficulties in social relationships: Children who lack the necessary emotional support find it difficult to build healthy relationships with others, both in childhood and adulthood.

3. Impact on mental health: Emotional neglect can lead to depression, anxiety, and other mood disorders at an early age, hindering their normal development. 4

Dr. René Spitz, an American psychoanalyst, highlighted the negative effects of emotional deprivation through a study of children in Romanian orphanages. What he discovered was devastating: emotionally deprived children suffered from reduced brain size, high levels of cortisol (a stress hormone that helps the body respond to danger) in their brains, and changes in the prefrontal cortex. 5

Causes of Emotional Deprivation

Emotional deprivation occurs for several reasons, including:

  • Parental Occupation: With the pressures of modern life and economic strains, parents may be preoccupied with work and find little time for emotional attention to their children.
  • Unhealthy Family Models: Some families rely on strict and harsh educational traditions where emotional expression is not allowed, promoting emotional deprivation.
  • Parents’ Psychological Problems: Some parents may themselves suffer from psychological issues or personality disorders that hinder their ability to provide emotional support to their children.

Since the early years shape and influence children's future, physical, mental, and emotional health, UNICEF launched a campaign called "Early Moments Matter." Its goal is to raise awareness of the importance of healthy brain development in the first years of life and to encourage investment by governments and companies in early childhood development programs, policies, and services, supporting parents and caregivers to give children the best start in life. 6

Islamic Guidance on Meeting Children’s Emotional Needs

In Islam, there are teachings that encourage a comprehensive upbringing for children, which includes emotional, physical, and spiritual aspects. Many hadiths emphasize kindness and love for children. The Prophet Muhammad ﷺ said: "He is not one of us who does not have mercy upon our young, nor knows the honor of our elders" (Tirmidhi). This prophetic guidance highlights the importance of mercy and tenderness when dealing with children.

It is also reported that the Prophet ﷺ would show love to children, kiss them, and play with them, indicating that emotional care is not optional but a parental duty. This was well understood by the honorable companion Anas ibn Malik, who lived with the Prophet as a child and served him for ten years, never experiencing any harshness or ill-treatment from the Prophet, only mercy and kindness.

Among the most notable hadiths in this context is the narration by Al-Aqra' ibn Habis, who saw the Prophet ﷺ kissing Hasan and Husayn, and said: "I have ten children, but I have never kissed any one of them, whereupon Allah's Messenger () said: He who does not show mercy (towards his children), no mercy would be shown to him." (Sahih Al-Bukhari).

Moreover, the Prophet ﷺ was keen on teaching children beneficial lessons. For example, Ibn Abbas -may Allah be pleased with him- narrated: "One day, I was behind the Prophet ﷺ when he said to me: 'O boy! I will instruct you in some matters. Be watchful of Allah (Commandments of Allah), He will preserve you. Safeguard His Rights, He will be ever with you. If you beg, beg of Him Alone...' " (Tirmidhi). 7

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1. Labayh for Mental and Family Health

2. Psychology Today: Emotional Deprivation or Neglect? How to Tell the Difference

3. Bangkok Hospital: Executive Functions Develop Children's Concentration

4. Positive Psychology: Childhood Emotional Neglect - 5 Consequences of Childhood Emotional Neglect

5. Psychology Today: Emotional Deprivation or Neglect? How to Tell the Difference

6. UNICEF: Early Moments Matter

7. Alseerah Alnabaweyah Website: The Prophet's Love for Children

 

Imam Ahmad narrated in his Musnad that Umar ibn Al-Khattab (may Allah be pleased with him) came to the Prophet ﷺ and said, “O Messenger of Allah, I passed by one of my brothers from Qurayzah, and he wrote for me a collection from the Torah. Shall I present it to you?” The face of the Messenger of Allah ﷺ changed. Abdullah ibn Thabit said, “I told him: ‘Do you not see the expression on the face of the Messenger of Allah ﷺ?’” Umar then said, “We are pleased with Allah as our Lord, with Islam as our religion, and with Muhammad ﷺ as our Prophet.” Then the Prophet ﷺ’s expression softened, and he said: “By the One in whose hand is my soul, if Musa were among you and you followed him and left me, you would have gone astray. You are my share among the nations, and I am your share among the Prophets.”

This hadith contains a warning and protection for the Ummah against intellectual invasions that could have harmful consequences. What are the essential policies the leader must adopt to protect the people from such threats?

1. Careful Monitoring of Ideas Introduced to Society

The leader is responsible for his people. Al-Bukhari and Muslim narrated from Abdullah ibn Umar that the Messenger of Allah ﷺ said: "All of you are guardians and are responsible for your wards. The ruler is a guardian and responsible for his subjects; the man is a guardian and responsible for his family; the woman is a guardian and is responsible for her husbands house and his offspring; and so all of you are guardians and are responsible for your wards.”

Being a responsible guardian requires paying attention to the people’s conditions, striving to bring benefit to them, and preventing harm.

Thus, the leader must monitor the ideas introduced to the society and assess their benefits and harms. Whatever is beneficial should be embraced and encouraged, while what is harmful should be prohibited and warned against.

2. Allowing the People to Present Their Ideas to the Leader

Allowing people the freedom to present the ideas they encounter to the leader is an important means of protection from fitnah (tribulation). Some ideas may be dangerous in ways that the general public cannot recognize. If the leader or specialized committees review these ideas and clarify their truth to the people, it enables the confrontation of ideas with reason and evidence, encouraging intellectual engagement and safeguarding against subtle doubts that might infiltrate in moments of heedlessness, taking hold in weak minds and sick hearts. Deviant groups could exploit such doubts to attack people's faith and beliefs.

3. Directing People Toward the Truth and Providing Evidence for It

When the Prophet ﷺ noticed Umar’s intention, he took the opportunity to clarify the matter to him and those present. The Prophet ﷺ highlighted that the texts Umar brought were not comparable to the divine guidance they had. The Prophet ﷺ even stressed that if Musa (peace be upon him) were alive, he would have had no option but to follow him.

The message here is that no one after the Prophet’s ﷺ mission should follow any other Prophet, as Muhammad ﷺ is the Seal of the Prophets. If these scriptures had remained untouched by distortion, they still would not surpass the final divine message. However, since they have been altered and corrupted, they no longer possess the truth and sanctity of Allah's unaltered revelation. Hence, no Muslim should replace divinely preserved revelation with distorted scriptures. "Would you exchange what is better for what is less?" (Al-Baqarah: 61).

The Prophet ﷺ’s clarification prevented unnecessary comparisons between Islam, which was still in its early stages, and older scriptures. When Islam becomes well-established and scholars proficiently study these texts to expose their distortions and falsehoods, it becomes permissible. Islam encourages such engagement: "And argue with them in a way that is best". (An-Nahl: 125).

4. Prohibition of Seeking Religious Guidance from Non-Muslims

Allah sent His Messenger ﷺ with guidance and the true religion to prevail over all others. The complete guidance is within Islam. Allah says: "Indeed, this Qur'an guides to that which is most suitable" (Al-Isra: 9).

A Muslim should not seek religious guidance outside the Qur'an or consult non-Muslims for spiritual direction, even if other laws appear advanced. Allah warns: "And whoever desires other than Islam as religion – never will it be accepted from him, and he, in the Hereafter, will be among the losers" (Ali-Imran: 85).

In Musnad Ahmad, Jabir narrated that the Messenger of Allah ﷺ said: “Do not ask the people of the Scripture about anything, for they will not guide you. They have gone astray. Verily, if you were to believe in falsehood, or deny the truth, you would be led astray. Indeed, even if Musa (Moses) were alive among you, he would have no choice but to follow me.”

5. Identifying and Warning Against Manifestations of Deviation

The leader must be aware of the deviations within ideas introduced to the community and make the people aware of them to prevent and protect them from falling into misguidance. The Prophet ﷺ would address behaviors that were contrary to Islamic moderation whenever he noticed them.

In Sahih al-Bukhari, Anas ibn Malik narrated: “A group of three men came to the houses of the wives of the Prophet () asking how the Prophet () worshipped (Allah), and when they were informed about that, they considered their worship insufficient and said, "Where are we from the Prophet () as his past and future sins have been forgiven." Then one of them said, "I will offer the prayer throughout the night forever." The other said, "I will fast throughout the year and will not break my fast." The third said, "I will keep away from the women and will not marry forever." Allah's Messenger () came to them and said, "Are you the same people who said so-and-so? By Allah, I am more submissive to Allah and more afraid of Him than you; yet I fast and break my fast, I do sleep and I also marry women. So he who does not follow my tradition in religion, is not from me (not one of my followers).”

In this incident, the Prophet ﷺ corrected their deviations and demonstrated the path of balance to prevent others from being deceived or misled by extremism.

Moreover, the Prophet ﷺ warned against future deviations and showed the path to protection from them. Al-Bukhari and Muslim reported that the Prophet ﷺ said: “In the last time people will come forth, young and foolish, speaking the finest words men speak, but their faith will not pass their throats. They will come out from the religion as an arrow does from the animal it is aimed at.”

This is a clear warning against deviant ideologies and a means to protect the Ummah from their danger and evil.

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Read this Article in Arabic

 

Look ahead or behind, to the right or left, or even reconsider repeatedly, in every direction and path, and search for a thought, methodology, or system that respects the human intellect, establishing its structure on appreciation, respect, activation, and reverence. You will find this only in Islam, for it has approached the intellect in a way that elevates its status and regulates its path so that it remains free from whims and builds a civilization that transcends the sky. This is evident in the following:

Firstly: Rejecting assumption where certainty is required:

Islamic intellect is based on rejecting assumption wherever certainty is sought, especially when it comes to establishing beliefs that form a person's view of existence, of Allah, the universe, humankind, and life. These great matters cannot rely on assumption; rather, they must be based on knowledge, that is, certain knowledge.

Thus, the Qur’an condemns the polytheists for following assumption in such matters, as Allah says: “And most of them follow not except assumption. Indeed, assumption avails not against the truth at all. Indeed, Allah is Knowing of what they do.” (Yunus: 36) And Allah says: “And they have thereof no knowledge. They follow not except assumption, and indeed, assumption avails not against the truth at all.” (An-Najm: 28)

In fact, the Qur’an confirms that the misguidance of most people is due to following assumption, as Allah says: “And if you obey most of those upon the earth, they will mislead you from the way of Allah. They follow not except assumption, and they are not but falsifying.” (Al-An'am: 116) And He said to His Messenger, peace be upon him: “But if they do not respond to you – then know that they only follow their [own] desires. And who is more astray than one who follows his desire without guidance from Allah? Indeed, Allah does not guide the wrongdoing people.” (Al-Qasas: 50)

Secondly: Not following whims and emotions in the field of knowledge:

The Islamic structure of the intellect does not allow a person to surrender to whims, as whims blind and deafen, and following emotions may mislead a person from the truth, especially extreme emotions like intense love, hatred, and anger. Therefore, Islam prohibits judgment during anger. In Sahih al-Bukhari and Muslim, Abu Bakra reported that the Prophet, peace be upon him, said: “No judge must give judgment between two people when he is angry,” because anger blocks the proper perception of the different aspects of the case.

Hence, the Qur’an criticized the polytheists for following both assumption and personal whims regarding their idols, as Allah says: “They are not but [mere] names you have named them – you and your forefathers – for which Allah has sent down no authority. They follow not except assumption and what their souls desire, and there has already come to them from their Lord guidance.” (An-Najm: 23) And Allah said to David, peace be upon him: “O David, indeed We have made you a successor upon the earth, so judge between the people in truth and do not follow [your own] desire, as it will lead you astray from the way of Allah.” (Sad: 26)

Thirdly: Rejecting blind imitation of parents and ancestors:

The Muslim intellect rejects stagnation based on the ways of parents and ancestors or blindly accepting their beliefs and actions. Instead, these should be subject to scrutiny and reflection. It is unreasonable for the dead to think for us while we are alive, or for the ancients to bind us to the conclusions of past times. We are bound by what our minds guide us to and what our reasoning concludes. It is a flaw to think with the minds of others when Allah has given us our own minds.

Thus, the Qur’an launched a fierce attack on stagnation and blind imitation in all its forms, as Allah says: “And when it is said to them, 'Follow what Allah has revealed,' they say, 'Rather, we will follow that which we found our forefathers doing.' Even though their fathers understood nothing, nor were they guided?” (Al-Baqarah: 170) Ibn al-Jawzi said: “Blind imitation nullifies the benefit of the intellect, for the intellect was created for contemplation and reflection. It is disgraceful for one who has been given a lamp to extinguish it and walk in darkness.” (1)

Fourthly: Rejecting subservience to leaders and the powerful:

Islam fought against blind imitation manifested in the subservience of people and masses to leaders, the powerful, tyrants, and the wealthy. The Qur’an condemned such blind subservience, holding the people accountable along with their misguiding leaders, as Allah says: “The Day their faces will be turned about in the Fire, they will say, 'How we wish we had obeyed Allah and obeyed the Messenger.' {66} And they will say, 'Our Lord, indeed we obeyed our masters and our dignitaries, and they led us astray from the [right] way.' {67} Our Lord, give them double the punishment and curse them with a great curse.” (Al-Ahzab)

The Qur’an also held followers accountable for their misguidance, for Allah gave them the capabilities to follow the right path, but they disregarded them and followed the misguiders. Allah says: “[Allah] will say, 'Enter among nations which had passed on before you of jinn and mankind into the Fire.' Every time a nation enters, it will curse its sister until, when they have all overtaken one another therein, the last of them will say about the first of them, 'Our Lord, these had misled us, so give them a double punishment of the Fire.' He will say, 'For each is double, but you do not know.' {38} And the first of them will say to the last of them, 'Then you had not any favor over us, so taste the punishment for what you used to earn.'” (Al-A'raf)

Fifthly: Worship through intellectual contemplation:

The Islamic mindset revolves around contemplation and reflection. In Islam, intellectual contemplation is a duty, and reflection is a form of worship. By contemplation, a person uses their intellect to reflect and consider, starting with themselves, then the closest things to them, and then expanding to reflect on the heavens and the earth. This contemplation leads to belief and certainty. The Qur’an encourages this, as Allah says: “And on the earth are signs for the certain [in faith], {20} and in yourselves. Then will you not see?” (Adh-Dhariyat: 20-21) And He says: “Then let mankind look at his food.” (Abasa: 24) And Allah also says: “Say, 'Observe what is in the heavens and the earth.' But of no avail will be signs or warners to a people who do not believe.” (Yunus: 101) And Allah also says: “We will show them Our signs in the horizons and within themselves until it becomes clear to them that it is the truth. But is it not sufficient concerning your Lord that He is, over all things, a Witness?” (Fussilat: 53)

Sixthly: No claim is accepted without proof:

The Muslim intellect does not accept any claim without scientific proof supporting it, demonstrating its validity and truthfulness. If there is no evidence to back a claim or issue, it is rejected. Allah says: “And they say, 'None will enter Paradise except one who is a Jew or a Christian.' That is [merely] their wishful thinking. Say, 'Produce your proof, if you should be truthful.'” (Al-Baqarah: 111) Allah’s words: “Produce your proof, if you should be truthful” have come in several verses of the Qur’an, refuting false claims and establishing that the Muslim intellect does not accept any claim without proof.

Seventhly: Observing Allah’s laws in the universe and society:

The Muslim intellect is based on respecting the laws and rules that Allah has established in the universe and society. These laws are universal and comprehensive, applying to all people equally, and they are fixed and enduring, not changing or being altered. They apply to others as they did to earlier generations. Allah says: “Similar situations [as yours] have passed on before you, so proceed throughout the earth and observe how was the end of those who denied.” (Ali-Imran: 137) And He says: “Then do they await except the way of the former peoples? But you will never find in the way of Allah any change, and you will never find in the way of Allah any alteration.” (Fatir: 43)

The early Muslims respected these laws, honored the chain of causes and effects, and built an exemplary civilization. This led to the flourishing of scientific knowledge in the natural and mathematical sciences, with its roots extending and branches flourishing, yielding fruits by God’s willing. (2)

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(1) Talbees Iblees, p. 74.

(2) Mind and Science in the Noble Qur'an, by Dr. Yusuf al-Qaradawi, p. 250.

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“This Quran elevates some people and lowers others.” Salim was a slave living in Mecca, like all the slaves there—without value or status, unremembered except in terms of ownership. But when Islam came, it elevated his status and placed him among the ranks of the greatest Companions. One of the great Companions, Abu Hudhayfa ibn Utba ibn Rabi'a, adopted him after freeing him. Abu Hudhayfa was one of the noble leaders of Quraysh.

Salim continued to live under the care of his adoptive father, Abu Hudhayfa, until the verse was revealed: “Call them by [the names of] their fathers; it is more just in the sight of Allah. But if you do not know their fathers, then they are [still] your brothers in religion and those entrusted to you. And there is no blame upon you for that in which you have erred but [only for] what your hearts intended. And Allah is ever Forgiving and Merciful” (Surah Al-Ahzab, 5). This verse was revealed concerning Zayd ibn Harithah, whom the Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) had adopted before it was revealed. After its revelation, Zayd returned to his original father's name. As for Salim, since his father's name was unknown, he was called Salim, the freed slave of Abu Hudhayfa, and he remained a brother, companion, and freedman to his former adopter. Through Allah's grace, Salim rose to a high and distinguished rank among the Muslims, due to his virtuous spirit, character, and piety. He became known as "Salim Mawla Abu Hudhayfa" (Salim, the freed slave of Abu Hudhayfa). He had early faith in Allah, taking his place among the foremost believers. 1

Abu Hudhayfa had accepted Islam despite his father’s opposition. His father was one of the leaders of disbelief and staunch opponents of Quraysh. He had been preparing his son for leadership, but when Salim and Abu Hudhayfa both embraced Islam, they endured Quraysh's harm together.

Al-Dhahabi said about him in "Siyar A'lam an-Nubala": " Salim Mawla Abu Hudhayfa, was one of the early pioneers who participated in Badr, and among the knowledgeable ones." Salim originally came from Istakhr, a region in Persia. He was initially a slave of Thubayta bint Ya'ar, an Ansari woman from the Aws tribe, the wife of Abu Hudhayfa. She freed Salim, and her husband adopted him. Abu Hudhayfa loved him deeply and even married him to his niece, Fatimah bint Al-Walid ibn Utba ibn Rabi'a. 2

1- His Love for the Quran:

Salim embraced Islam early in Mecca and had a deep love for Allah’s words and the Quran. He was diligent in memorizing it. When the Muslims migrated to Medina, Salim was chosen to lead the prayers for the Muhajirun in Quba because he was the most knowledgeable of them in the Quran. Abdullah ibn Umar reported: "When the first group of the Muhajirun arrived in Quba before the Prophet, Salim led them in prayer," and this group included Umar and Abu Salama ibn Abd al-Asad.

Al-Waqidi narrated that Aflah ibn Sa'id, from Muhammad ibn Ka'b al-Qurazi, said: "Salim led the Muhajirun in Quba, including Umar, before the Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) arrived."

2- The Prophet's Praise for Him:

The Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) encouraged the Companions to learn the Quran from four of its reciters, and Salim was one of them.

Abdullah ibn Amr ibn al-As narrated that the Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) said: "Take (learn) the Qur'an from four: from Ibn Mas'ud, Salim the freed slave of Abu Hudhayfa, Ubayy ibn Ka'b, and Mu'adh ibn Jabal" (Narrated by Bukhari and Muslim).

The chapter title “Virtues of Salim Mawla Abu Hudhayfa” refers to the son of Utba ibn Rabi'a. Salim was adopted by Abu Hudhayfa, who was a prominent Companion and participated in the Battle of Badr with the Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him). His father was killed as a disbeliever that day, which saddened Abu Hudhayfa, who had hoped for his father to accept Islam, seeing the intelligence he possessed. Abu Hudhayfa was martyred at the Battle of Yamama. As for Salim, he was one of the early believers who was knowledgeable in the Quran. He had also led the Muhajirun in prayer at Quba when they first arrived from Mecca, and he participated in the Battle of Badr and the battles that followed. It is said that his father's name was Ma'qal. He was a freed slave of a woman from the Ansar, and Abu Hudhayfa adopted him after marrying her, attributing Salim to himself. Salim was also martyred at Yamama. 3

Salim was known for his beautiful recitation of the Quran. His voice softened hearts and brought joy to souls. His recitation drew people to listen to his recitation. Imam Ahmad narrated that Abd al-Rahman ibn Sabit reported from Aisha (may Allah be pleased with her) that the Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) once asked her why she was delayed. She replied: "There is in the mosque the best voice I have ever heard reciting the Quran." The Prophet took his garment and went out to listen, and it was Salim Mawla Abu Hudhayfa. The Prophet said: “Praise be to Allah, who made someone like you in my nation" (This narration has a good chain of transmission).

3- His Close Companionship with the Prophet:

When the Prophet migrated to Medina, Salim, like other Muslims, stayed close to him and learned many hadiths from him. Among those who narrated from him were Thabit ibn Qays ibn Shammas, Abdullah ibn Umar, and Abdullah ibn Amr ibn al-As. The Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) formed a brotherhood between Salim and Mu’adh ibn Ma’s, though some say it was between him and Abd al-Rahman ibn Awf, though this chain is disconnected, as al-Dhahabi noted. 4

4- His Status Among the Companions:

Salim was one of the respected Muslims and great Companions. The Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) praised and honored him.

Umar ibn al-Khattab often praised Salim. He considered him qualified for the Caliphate. Ibn Kathir narrated in "Al-Bidaya wa al-Nihaya" that Umar said during his final illness: “Had Salim been alive, I would not have made it a council.” 5

Imam Ahmad narrated in his Musnad that Abu Rafi’ reported that Umar ibn al-Khattab said: "If either of two men had survived me, I would have entrusted the matter to him: Salim Mawla Abu Hudhayfa, or Abu Ubaida ibn al-Jarrah." He also said: “If I had appointed Salim, the freed slave of Abu Hudhayfa, as the Caliph, and my Lord asked me why, I would have said: ‘O Lord, I heard Your Prophet say that Salim truly loves You with all his heart.’” 6

5- His Jihad and Martyrdom:

Salim was passionate about jihad, eager for martyrdom, and committed to attending all the battles in which the Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) participated.

He was present at Badr, fought bravely, and stood at the front lines. He also witnessed the battles of Uhud, al-Nadir, Banu Qurayza, and al-Ahzab, and the Treaty of Hudaybiyyah. He pledged his allegiance to the Prophet under the tree to fight until death to enter Mecca, about whom Allah said: “Certainly was Allah pleased with the believers when they pledged allegiance to you, [O Muhammad], under the tree, and He knew what was in their hearts, so He sent down tranquility upon them and rewarded them with an imminent conquest” (Surah Al-Fath, 18). He also participated in the conquest of Mecca, the battles of Hunayn, Ta'if, Mu'tah, and others. He was part of the army led by Usama ibn Zayd, which the Prophet ordered to be prepared to march against the Romans shortly before his death.

After the Prophet's death, Salim participated in the wars against the apostates with Abu Bakr al-Siddiq, where he performed valiantly. During these wars, he attained martyrdom, satisfied and content, fighting for the sake of Allah.

His martyrdom occurred at the Battle of Yamama during the fight against Musaylima the liar and Banu Hanifa. He was one of the battle's heroes and the bearer of the Muslims' banner.

Ibn Kathir said: "When he took the banner at the Battle of Yamama after the death of Zayd ibn al-Khattab, the Muhajirun said to him: 'Do you fear we might be defeated from your direction?' He replied: 'How bad a Quran-bearer I would be then!'"

It was a fierce battle and a severe war. Al-Waqidi mentioned that when the Muslims were overwhelmed during the Battle of Yamama, Salim Mawla Abu Hudhayfa, said: 'This is not how we used to act with the Messenger of Allah, peace be upon him.' So he dug a hole for himself, stood in it, and held the banner of the Muhajirun that day, then he fought until his right hand was cut off. He took the banner with his left hand, but it too was cut off. He then embraced the banner and recited: “Muhammad is not but a messenger. [Other] messengers have passed on before him. So if he was to die or be killed, would you turn back on your heels [to unbelief]? And he who turns back on his heels will never harm Allah at all; but Allah will reward the grateful.” (Surah Ali Imran: 144). He continued holding the banner until he fell. When he felt death approaching, he said to his companions: 'What happened to Abu Hudhayfa?' They replied: 'He was killed.' He asked: 'What about so-and-so?' They replied: 'He was killed.' He then said: 'Lay me down between them (i.e., bury me between them).'

In Al-Istiab by Ibn Abd al-Barr, it is mentioned that Salim and his master Abu Hudhayfa were both killed, and one’s head was found at the feet of the other. May Allah reward them both greatly on behalf of Islam and the Muslims.

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(1) Men Around the Messenger, Khalid Muhammad Khalid, p. 460.

(2) Siyar A'lam al-Nubala', Shams al-Din al-Dhahabi.

(3) Fath al-Bari, Commentary on Sahih al-Bukhari, Vol. 7, p. 127.

(4) Men Around the Messenger.

(5) Al-Bidaya wa'l-Nihaya, Ibn Kathir, Vol. 6, p. 336.

(6) Hilyat al-Awliya', (1/177).                                                  

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A person can overcome feelings of frustration, depression, and sadness, and give themselves a dose of positivity, energy, and improvement in their mood and mental state. This can serve as a lifeline to help them break free from the negative thought patterns that some people tend to follow.

Here, you assume the role of a psychiatrist and therapist for your condition, starting from recognizing that you are experiencing a bad mood and that your mental state is affected, to diagnosing the causes. Whether it's due to the influence of negative people around you, excessive focus on the negative aspects of your life, or a result of going through a crisis.

You'll also prescribe your own treatment and recover quickly from that state. For some, one step may be enough to gain positive energy, for others, two or three steps might be necessary. Some may need to continuously engage in actions that grant them what they seek in terms of doses of energy and hope. In essence, each of us is our own doctor, and prevention is better than cure.

To get a quick dose of positivity, here are four simple things to consider:

First: Stay away from negative people and avoid being influenced by them. Do not spend much time with them, even if there are ties like work or kinship between you, because being around such personalities has a significantly negative impact. They may spread the contagion of sadness, so don't hesitate to distance yourself from them and take the time you need to free yourself from such atmospheres, according to the Spanish magazine La Vida Lucida.

It is wise to recognize the nature of such personalities, who view everything pessimistically, tend to exaggerate problems, and spread frustration, misery, and despair. Remember that Allah's mercy is vast, and that He manages the affairs of the heavens and the earth, and relief is near. Your Lord is near. Allah says: "And when My servants ask you, [O Muhammad], concerning Me – indeed I am near. I respond to the invocation of the supplicant when he calls upon Me. So let them respond to Me [by obedience] and believe in Me that they may be [rightly] guided." (Al-Baqarah: 186).

Second: Don’t take things personally. Don’t waste your time interpreting what others say or do to you, whether it’s someone speaking ill of you, insulting you, ignoring you, rejecting your invitation, or canceling a meeting with you, or any other form of mistreatment. Don’t let these things affect your feelings. Put them in their proper perspective, and don’t blow them out of proportion, so they don’t negatively affect you. Also, don’t keep dwelling on past sorrows and recalling sad memories.

Third: Invest your time better. It’s an ideal way to help you relieve tension and process negative emotions. Engage in a hobby, exercise, go out for a walk, write in your journal, enjoy a meal, meet with a favorite friend, take a trip, watch a meaningful comedy, take a bath, and other activities that can provide you with a dose of positivity, hope, and optimism.

Fourth: Focus on yourself, develop your thoughts and goals, and give yourself a good amount of appreciation and attention. For example, restore your beautiful emotions, focus on the things you love, and don’t waste your energy trying to please others. Work on becoming a better person, talk about something positive that makes you happy, or do good deeds, increase acts of kindness, and you’ll find yourself filled with high levels of energy, positivity, and happiness. Allah Almighty says: "Those who spend their wealth [in Allah's way] by night and by day, secretly and publicly – they will have their reward with their Lord. And no fear will there be concerning them, nor will they grieve" (Al-Baqarah: 274), meaning they will not grieve over what they have spent for Allah’s sake or over what they missed out on from worldly things. Nor will they grieve for what they leave behind after their death, because these things are insignificant in their eyes, and they trust that what is with Allah is better and more lasting. As Allah says: "Indeed, those who have said, 'Our Lord is Allah' and then remained on a right course – there will be no fear concerning them, nor will they grieve" (Al-Ahqaf: 13).

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Life may require a certain degree of flexibility and negotiation skills, whether in your job or during a crisis you want to emerge from with minimal losses and maximum gains. This is known as the "art of negotiation," which is now taught in economic, political, and military academies.

It's certain that we will all face this experience one day, whether negotiating for a salary raise, transitioning to a new job, seeking funding for a business, or aiming for better returns in trade. Life is full of developments and negotiations in pursuit of better opportunities. Therefore, it is essential to overcome shyness, be clear about your demands, and lay out the details on the table.

A British study from Stanford University provides the following recommendations:

1. Establishing Communication Bridges: Opening lines of communication with the other party paves the way for successful negotiation, as it helps break the ice between both sides and builds trust, leading to better outcomes. The study, which targeted students negotiating via email, showed that students who shared personal details beyond the scope of negotiation achieved much better results than those who conducted the negotiations in a formal, typical manner without engaging in small talk.

2. Politeness in Negotiation: The study advises maintaining politeness during negotiation instead of shouting, arrogance, or using offensive language, as such approaches will not yield the desired results and may even prevent the negotiation from happening. Using a polite tone, especially with women, tends to make the negotiation more calm and leads to better outcomes, as long as it’s not overdone, to avoid the other party feeling flattered or deceived

3. Specify Financial Details: It’s important to specify financial details, such as requesting a certain salary, and avoid using round numbers. Instead, ask for a specific amount, like 320 dinars or 460 dollars. This suggests that you’ve done a precise study to arrive at that specific figure, according to a research study from Columbia Business School. The study confirms that this method in negotiation makes the other party feel your honesty and professionalism, as you're negotiating based on specific, fixed criteria rather than just estimates or a desire for a large salary without considering your experience and capabilities.

4. Maintaining Eye Contact: Another study indicates that one of the most successful ways to gain others' trust is to maintain steady eye contact during discussions. Therefore, it’s important to use direct and steady eye contact and look the other party in the eyes during negotiation. Practicing this skill is essential because direct eye contact gives the other party the sense that you have enough confidence in yourself to engage in serious negotiation, and that you have a strong, positive personality capable of persuasion. On the other hand, avoiding eye contact may give the impression that you’re untrustworthy, hiding something, or have a weak personality, making the other party doubt your ability to handle the position or task effectively.

5. Face-to-Face Negotiation: Negotiators recommend not engaging in face-to-face negotiations unless you’re the stronger party, as the stronger party usually wins the negotiation due to having leverage. If you are in the weaker position, it’s better to negotiate over the phone or via email. Negotiating through indirect means gives you time to think, provided you organize your thoughts and prioritize, such as negotiating the salary first, then the workplace, then vacation days, and so on.

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