Ibn Ghanam al-Maqdisi narrates from Ibn Sirin that one of the caliphs saw in a dream that all his teeth had fallen out. He recounted his dream to an interpreter, who said: “All your family will die, leaving you alone.”
The caliph was deeply angered by this interpretation. He then summoned another interpreter and recounted his dream again. This interpreter replied: “You will live the longest among your family.” The caliph was pleased with this response because it conveyed the same meaning in a positive manner by focusing on life rather than death. (1)
It is beautiful to remain silent from uttering harmful words, even more beautiful to speak good words, and the most beautiful is to soften one's speech to turn bitter advice into words that others wish to hear a thousand times.
When Allah loves a servant, He guides them to good speech, as He described the successful believers: “And they had been guided [in worldly life] to good speech, and they were guided to the path of the Praiseworthy.” (Al-Hajj: 24)
Thus, good words are a guidance from Allah to the believers and a gift to all people. They strengthen the weak, heal the broken, encourage the young, and bring joy to the old. Below are some social benefits of kind words:
- A Sign of the Speaker's Good Origin:
Allah says, “Evil words are for evil men, and evil men are [subjected] to evil words. And good words are for good men, and good men are [an object] of good words. Those [good people] are declared innocent of what the slanderers say. For them is forgiveness and noble provision.” (An-Nur: 26)
Some people interpret this ayah to mean that corrupt women are for corrupt men, and good women are for good men. However, although the general wording of the ayah does not prevent this interpretation, it has a specific context. The ayah was revealed regarding those who slandered Umm al-Mu'minin Aisha, the wife of the Prophet (peace be upon him), in the incident of al-Ifk (the false accusation). The ayah signifies that corrupt words are for corrupt people, while good people select the best words because they are most deserving of them. (2) This indicates that kind words reflect the good nature and integrity of the speaker.
- Has Good Fruit:
Allah gives a wonderful example in the Quran of the difference between a good word and an evil word, emphasizing that the good word bears good fruit. Allah says, “Have you not considered how Allah presents an example, [making] a good word like a good tree, whose root is firmly fixed and its branches [high] in the sky? It produces its fruit all the time, by permission of its Lord. And Allah presents examples for the people that perhaps they will be reminded. And the example of a bad word is like a bad tree, uprooted from the surface of the earth, not having any stability.” (Ibrahim: 24-26)
- Spreads Goodness:
Not only is the origin of the speaker of kind words good, but the gathering where kind words prevail is also good. This is demonstrated in a narration by Imam Ahmad in his Musnad from Abu Hurairah: A man insulted Abu Bakr while the Prophet, peace and blessings be upon him, was sitting down. The Prophet was initially impressed by Abu Bakr and he smiled, but then Abu Bakr insulted the man with some of the same words as him. The Prophet became angry and he stood to leave. Abu Bakr went to the Prophet, and he said, “O Messenger of Allah, the man insulted me, and you were sitting, but when I responded in kind, you became angry and stood up.” The Prophet said, “Verily, there was an angel with you responding on your behalf, but Satan appeared when you responded with some of the same words as him. I will not sit in the presence of Satan.”
- Form of Virtue:
Al-Bayhaqi and Ibn Abi Dunya narrated from Ibn Umar that he said: “Virtue is something accessible: a cheerful face and gentle speech.”
- Brings Love:
In Al-Targhib wal-Tarhib, Ali (may Allah be pleased with him) said: “He whose speech is gentle, his love is obligatory.”
- Reflects High Manners:
One who looks into the Noble Quran, the noble Prophetic Sunnah, and the lives of the righteous finds multiple examples that confirm that the refined taste possessed by virtuous people drives them to choose the best and most eloquent words, to protect themselves from foul speech and safeguards others from having their feelings hurt.
One such example is found in the story of Prophet Ibrahim's invitation to his father in Surah Maryam, where he repeatedly addressed him with “O my father...”—an expression that signifies kindness and gentleness in speech. Despite this, his father's harsh and coarse response, as recounted in the Quranic ayah, was: “[His father] said, 'Have you no desire for my gods, O Abraham? If you do not desist, I will surely stone you, so avoid me a prolonged time.'” (Maryam: 46) However, Prophet Ibrahim (peace be upon him) maintained his gentle speech and behavior, responding: “[Abraham] said, 'Peace will be upon you. I will ask forgiveness for you of my Lord. Indeed, He is ever gracious to me.'” (Maryam: 47)
Similarly, Prophet Yusuf (peace be upon him), after being harmed by his brothers, was blessed by Allah with goodness and kingship, becoming the 'Aziz (chief minister) of Egypt. When his brothers came to him in a state of humiliation, he spoke kindly to his father in their presence, saying: “O my father, O my father, this is the explanation of my vision of before. My Lord has made it reality. And He was certainly good to me when He took me out of prison and brought you [here] from bedouin life after Satan had induced [estrangement] between me and my brothers. Indeed, my Lord is Subtle in what He wills. Indeed, it is He who is the Knowing, the Wise.” (Yusuf: 100) He chose the most gracious words, saying “when He took me out of prison” instead of “when He took me out of the well,” to avoid hurting his brothers' feelings. Moreover, he did not attribute their plotting to them but to Satan.
Prophet Isa (peace be upon him), while passing by some people with his companions, was greeted with harsh words but responded kindly. They repeated their rude remarks, and he continued to respond with kindness. On the third instance, his companions asked him about this, and he replied: “Everyone spends from what he has.” It is also narrated that when he passed by a dog, he said, “Pass in peace.” When his companions asked why he did not insult the dog like common people, he responded, “So as not to accustom my tongue to foul language.”
The Messenger of Allah (peace be upon him) was known for his kind speech. In Sahih al-Bukhari, Anas ibn Malik reported: “The Prophet (ﷺ) was not one who would abuse (others) or say obscene words, or curse (others).”
An example of refined speech is also found in the conduct of the Prophet's uncle, al-Abbas, who was asked: “Who is older, you or the Prophet?” He replied, “The Prophet is greater, but I was born before him.”
Furthermore, when Umar ibn al-Khattab was inspecting the conditions of his people one day, he came across some people who had kindled a fire. To call out to them, he chose not to say “O people of the fire,” fearing they might think he was cursing them to be people of the Hellfire. Instead, he called them “O people of the light.”
Additionally, a certain judge had a blind companion. Whenever he wanted to get up, he would say, “O boy, go with Abu Muhammad,” instead of saying, “Take his hand,” ensuring he did not hurt his companion's feelings. The blind man swore by Allah that he had never been wronged in this manner even once. (3)
-------------------------------------------------------------
- Ibn Ghannam al-Maqdisi, Nuzhat al-Anam fi Ta'bir al-Ahlam, p. 161.
- Al-Tabari, Tafsir al-Tabari, (19/ 142).
- Ibn Qayyim al-Jawziyya, Al-Turuq al-Hukmiyah, p. 41.
Read the Article in Arabic
