5 Ways to Care for Your Grandparents in Islam
The
younger generation often makes a serious mistake when becoming absorbed in phones,
electronic games, and social media, neglecting elderly grandparents—without
realizing their deep need for direct human interaction and for inclusion in
activities that protect them from dementia, illness, and the effects of aging.
According
to a medical study issued by the American Psychological Association, grandparents who provide care for their
grandchildren enjoy better cognitive functioning than those who do not. The
study also found that grandparents involved in childcare scored higher on
memory tests.
Caring for Grandparents: A Religious and
Human Necessity
This
social and family role represents a valuable addition to the lives of the
elderly and enhances their sense of importance—especially since old age is
often accompanied by neglect and boredom.
Allah,
the Exalted, Says, {If one or both of them reach
old age in your care, never say to them ˹even˺ ‘ugh,’ nor yell at them. Rather, address them respectfully. And be humble with
them out of mercy, and pray, “My Lord! Be merciful to them as they raised me
when I was young.”} [Al-Isra’ 17:23–24]
Ibn Hazm
stated in his book on the levels of scholarly consensus that scholars
unanimously agreed on the obligation of honoring grandparents, saying: “They
agreed that honoring parents is obligatory, and they agreed that honoring
grandparents is obligatory.”
How to Treat Grandparents in Islam
These
lines offer five important pieces of advice regarding how to treat your
grandfather or grandmother:
1. Respect, Honor, and Care
for Them
Respecting,
venerating, and honoring grandparents, and providing them with care and
support, is essential. The Prophet (peace be upon him) said: “He is not one
of us who does not have mercy upon our young, respect our elders, and command
good and forbid evil.” (Reported by At-Tirmidhi)
Furthermoe,
the Messenger of Allah (peace be upon him) said:
“Part of respect for Allah is to show respect to
an old Muslim.” (Reported by Abu
Dawud)
2. Engage in Conversation with
Them
Talk with
them regularly, help stimulate their memory, and give them the opportunity to
recall past events and the people they lived among. This activates memory,
reinforces their sense of self, and makes them feel that their grandchildren
are listening to them and truly care.
3. Assign Them Tasks
Allowing
grandparents to carry out even simple tasks gives them a strong sense of
purpose and importance. This can include caring for sick grandchildren, picking
them up from school or daycare, preparing meals, hosting them overnight, or
playing with them.
A study
conducted by Tilburg University found that grandparents who acted as caregivers
for their grandchildren showed better cognitive functioning, and those involved
in childcare achieved higher scores on memory tests.
4. Bring Them Joy and
Express Gratitude
Visit
them regularly, bring them gifts, and show gratitude for everything they have
given to their children and grandchildren throughout their lives. Take pride in
their history, recount their achievements, honor their legacy, and pray for them.
5. Make Things Easy for
Them and Consider Their Condition
Facilitating
matters for the elderly and being considerate of their condition is essential.
The
Prophet (peace
be upon him) said: “When
one of you leads the people in prayer, he should be brief, for among them are
the weak, the sick, and the aged. But when one of you prays by himself, he may
pray as long as he likes.” (Reported
by Abu Dawud)
Among the
ways of making things easy for them is allowing them to break the fast in
Ramadan and not embarrassing them if they do so due to illness or weakness,
when they are unable to fast.
For Further Reading:
- 4 Ways to Overcome Screen Addiction
- 7 Ways to Support Orphans for Life
- Great Virtue of Gratitude
-------------------------------------------------------------
